emo

if you are going to judge... don't read...
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我觉的，不开心怎的很辛苦。想哭也哭不到。想笑也笑不出来。怎的很辛苦哦。有结局的放达吗？ 我现在怎的很不开心。为什么？我也不懂。你可以告诉我吗？我怎的很想寄到。
神阿，请你帮帮我把！我寄到我很久没有跟你谈天。我寄到我不忙。我既是懒惰。怎的很对不起。

i have no idea how many words written above is correct, but nevertheless, i've tried to fully utilise the few years of mandarin classes taken when i was young...
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today is really a bad day.. i feel weird throughout the entire day... i didn't talk much.. i didn't laugh much..
i am able to sense uneasiness the moment i started working.. and guess what? i worked throughout the entire day non stop! not 1 moment did i stopped to be lazy and do my own things... i've talked less i realised... is that why i'm stressed out? or is something bothering me? am i stressed out because of 'that'?
i seriously wonder, do we really need to be 'down' sometimes? i'd rather be 'up' and happy.. cause it's really tiring to be 'down'...
it feels terrible to be 'down'...
things became worse when dad told me he don't want to have dinner with us cause' there's nothing for him to eat... he cancelled the dinner around 6.30pm.. sigh.. not helping.. =.=" and no, i'm not blaming him.. just that, what he told me didn't help me with my mood...
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i still feel terrible now...
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and, i'm craving for 'fu chuk bak goh tong sui'... (randomness)